By: Lisa M. Hayes – Confluence Daily is your daily news source for women in the know.
The allegations against Brett Kavanaugh — outlined now on the record in the Washington Post by Palo Alto University professor Christine Blasey Ford are terrifying. They also feel way too familiar to too many women who can relate in ways no one should have to. Ford claims that Kavanaugh knocked her down, groped her, and attempted to remove her clothes.
Here’s the gist of her story:
While his friend watched, she said, Kavanaugh pinned her to a bed on her back and groped her over her clothes, grinding his body against hers and clumsily attempting to pull off her one-piece bathing suit and the clothing she wore over it. When she tried to scream, she said, he put his hand over her mouth.
“I thought he might inadvertently kill me,” said Ford, now a 51-year-old research psychologist in northern California. “He was trying to attack me and remove my clothing.”
Ford said she was able to escape when Kavanaugh’s friend and classmate at Georgetown Preparatory School, Mark Judge, jumped on top of them, sending all three tumbling. She said she ran from the room, briefly locked herself in a bathroom and then fled the house.
However, the really great news is sixty-five women who knew Brett Kavanaugh during high school have signed an expertly penned by a PR team letter vouching for his outstanding and morally sound character.
So, nothing to see here — right??
I’m not here to debate the validity of Christine Blasey Ford’s claims. The media, the Senate, Kavanaugh’s legal team, and people around the water cooler will handle that. It’s no different than anytime a woman comes forward with a sexual assault claim. She’s always suspect – no matter how long she waits to report, whether she dials 911 from the scene of her rape or waits thirty years.
I’ve tried to imagine what it has felt like for Christine Blasey Ford. I’ve tried to imagine watching my attacker on the news every day in confirmation hearings. I’ve wondered if it would undo all the progress she made in therapy trying to get over the trauma of that attack. I can’t imagine the responsibility she had to weigh realizing her attacker was literally about to take a seat on the highest court in the land. I’ve wondered what she said to herself, how she convinced herself it had to be done knowing many people wouldn’t believe her.
In case you’re wondering why someone might wait thirty years to come forward after a sexual assault, you might want to consider how it felt to read that statement by those sixty-five women. Some of those women she undoubtedly knew. Statistics tell us that out of those sixty-five women who decided to publicly suggest Christine Blasey Ford is lying approximately eleven also been victims of sexual assault. One in six women are.
I am not going to suggest all sixty-five of those women are traitors to our gender but as a victim of sexual assault, it sure feels like it. Here’s what I know about the man who assaulted me – he most certainly didn’t rape every woman he encountered. I’m sure he could have come up with a list of women who could say nice things about him. Potentially even sixty-five women would say he isn’t a rapist. Maybe he didn’t rape every woman he went on a date with. That doesn’t mean he didn’t rape me.
I don’t know what’s going to happen with Brett Kavanaugh’s confirmation. I am afraid he will, in fact, take a seat on the United States Supreme Court. The Republican-led Congress doesn’t exactly have a stellar track record with issues like women’s rights or even a woman’s right not to be raped.
What I do know is we can’t expect our lawmakers and our government to protect us. They never really have. They certainly aren’t even pretending to care now. We need to learn how to and commit to protecting each other. As women, we might start by not questioning the credibility of others who have the courage to come forward, no matter when or how they do it. Women are the majority. However, that majority is meaningless. It holds no power if we divide ourselves.
I’m tired of #metoo. No kidding. Too many of us can use that hashtag, the number of which is only a surprise to men. The only hashtag I’m interested is #nomore.
To Christine Blasey Ford, thank you for doing the thing you have lived the last thirty years or so hoping you would never have to. You can count me as one of the millions of women who are NOT among those sixty-five.
Call your Senators today. This website makes is SUPER EASY.
More by Lisa:
Brett Kavanaugh: Settled Law, Email Theft, and a Shaky Relationship with the Truth
Lisa M. Hayes, Senior Editor of Confluence Daily.
Confluence Daily is the one place where everything comes together. The one-stop for daily news for women.
