One place where everything comes together
Reading Time: 2 minutes As the world grapples with how to contain the swift-moving virus, the guide also reminds readers to stay home and avoid contact with anyone outside of your direct household or “close circle.” If you do need to leave, try to stay 6 feet apart from other people. And remember, your safest sex partner is you.
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Reading Time: 4 minutes Marriage doesn’t have to be be the place where desire goes to die.
Married women, withholding and controlling sex is hurting you, not just him.
It’s denying yourself of his medicine.
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Reading Time: 2 minutes Let’s talk about transgression – what’s behind it, why do we do it, and how do we make sense of it within committed relationships. And because you can’t really talk about transgression without mentioning monogamy and attraction for others, we’re talking about that, too. Oh, and a disclaimer before you hear this episode: the vibe we’re putting off in this episode did not happen overnight. It took years for us to be this open, honest, and playful with each other, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.
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Reading Time: 3 minutes Rape roleplay isn’t inherently bad or good, but I’m curious about your partner’s interest in it, and his role in it.
When children play games it’s not unusual for them to sometimes choose the “villain” role, because role play is a safe(r) way to experience something new, but it’s disconcerting and suggests a power imbalance if he pressures you to proceed with this, especially if he knows that you’ve been hurt by a rapist in real life.
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Reading Time: 4 minutes If a long-term relationship and marriage is a goal of yours, I suggest you invest in the quality of raw, sometimes uncomfortable discussion about your desires: do you like flirting with your barista? Do you and he want to send sexy pics to other consenting people or couples? Does he and you have freedom to look at sexually charged material on your own time, without having to report back to the other? My boyfriend and I feel comfortable bringing up our monogamish leanings; it helps us keep realistic about our very real desires, even if we don’t wish to act on them.
“Forever” is a lot longer than most people realize, especially when the new-relationship excitement is so strong; it seems like it will never fade. It’s time to reframe how we talk about our desires – and remember that being married by thirty could mean fifty years of time with your companion of choice.
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Reading Time: 2 minutes It doesn’t sound silly at all – even experienced sex workers sometimes feel awkward when vocalizing sexy-speak that’s been requested from men. Partner sex shouldn’t always feel awkward, but new things or kinky requests can be stomach-turning if you aren’t sure how to address them. It’s up to you to determine if you’d like to dabble in dirty talk for your partner’s pleasure, because it’s healthy to make efforts for your partner, as long as it doesn’t cause you serious discomfort. I appreciate him asking for what he likes, now it’s your opportunity to be advantageous
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Reading Time: 3 minutes Most kids aren’t ready for the responsibilities that come with having risk-aware partner contact, and many adults never become responsible at all: but it’s never to late or early to learn some good ideas around sexuality.
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Reading Time: 2 minutes Most porn (and media in general) is produced by men and with straight men’s consumption in mind, so it’s not surprising that so much of the stuff you’ll see on Pornhub doesn’t strike you as sensual or with women’s pleasure as a focus.
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Reading Time: 2 minutes Tell your child that men and women have sex in the ways that they decide feels good to them, for some people that might mean with their penises, mouths, hands, feet, stomach rolls, armpits : there is no “proper” way to have sex. Secondly, as a kid who was (kind of) caught digging through their parents’ porn, I Do suggest buying her a kid-friendly book such as Sex Is a Funny Word and ask her if she knows what pornography is. Tell your child that porn is something that humans have made for thousands of years, and that one study suggests up to 85% of women in America report having watched it at some point in their lives.
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Reading Time: 2 minutes Plenty of articles will tell you that women (and all people) experience orgasm differently; some people cry after or feel conflicted during – sensations of sexual pleasure can bring up feelings around shame or trauma relating to sexuality. Ask yourself if you have any negative experiences in your personal sexual history that might be making you feel odd about experiencing orgasm or genital pleasure.
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